blarg.

 This is going to be a long semester.... I just feel beat already. 

I'm not sure whats going on, but i feel brain fuzz. My body is heavy. I slept great last night and HEAVILY but I feel like I didn't get a wink. 

New allotment of time

 Okay so this systems class if going to actually be the death of me and if I don’t want to fail it will take the most time I have what so ever. So in order not to forget my other classes, but give it the dedication it requires.... here’s the new schedule.

Week 1.

Monday: 

-work: F&B quiz. Lodging quiz. Start SOTU Module. 

-home: F&B reading.

Tuesday: 

-work F&B discussion board. Finish SOTU module. 

- home: start environmental systems. 

Wednesday:

Work -  Environmental systems.

Home- environmental systems

Thursday:

Work - environmental systems. 

Home - therapy. Self care routine. 

Friday:

Work - work on bigger projects for other 3 classes.

Home - environmental systems. 

———-

Saturday: environmental systems. D&D

Sunday: Dr.Knox appointment. 

Week 2

Monday: 

-work: F&B quiz. Lodging quiz. Start SOTU Module. 

-home: F&B reading.

Tuesday: 

-work F&B discussion board. Finish SOTU module. 

- home: environmental systems. 

Wednesday:

Work -  Environmental systems Discussion board. 

Home- environmental systems discussion board. 

Thursday:

Work - environmental systems test while Donald is at lunch. Email professor with questions.

Home - therapy. Self care routine. Review email response. 

Friday:

Work - work on bigger projects for other 3 classes.

Home - environmental systems test again if need be.

———-

Saturday: work on any bigger projects as needed D&D

Sunday: Dr.Knox appointment. 

I will decide the number of videos and articles to read by 7. Have an allotted amount needed to process each day. I must meet that quota if I will finish the assignments in time. Gods above I will need all the help I can get with this course.  

Set Schedule / Keeping Up part 2

****Due to the sheer size of the homework load I will probably have to watch/listen to systems videos every day. 

WEEK 1

Monday:

- at work: Environmental systems reading.

-at home: Environmental systems videos. 

Tuesday

- at work: Do a SOTU module and Lodging Module

- at home: Food and Beverage Reading (phone)

Wednesday

- at work: Food and Beverage DB/Quiz

- at home: BREATHE/Read Brigid

Thursday

- at work: Environmental Systems 

- at home: Therapy and Brigid Chapter

Friday

- at work: Catch up on anything not done prior/Work on bigger assignments

- at home: Bigid Chapter if not done sooner/Brigid Conversation or ritual.

----------------

Saturday: D&D

Sunday: Breathe. 

WEEK 2

Monday 

- at work: Environmental systems reading.

-at home: Environmental systems videos. 

Tuesday

- at work: Do a SOTU module and Lodging Module 

- at home: Food and Beverage Reading (phone)

Wednesday

- at work: Food and Beverage Quiz & Discussion Board. -  SOTU Module if possible. 

- at home:  Breathe. 

Thursday

- at work: Take Environmental Quiz and discussion bard. - Lodging if possible. 

- at home: Therapy and Brigid Chapter

Friday

- at work: Catch up on anything not done prior/Work on bigger assignments

- at home: Bigid Chapter if not done sooner/Brigid Conversation or ritual.

----------------

Saturday: D&D

Sunday: Breathe. (Environmental systems due)

***This week is a hustle because I underestimated the load of the environmental systems. SOTU and LODGING has been replaced with Environmental systems. Next week I will no longer be ahead, but will be on pace. I will need to do extra modules to get back ahead of the curve. 

*** Work Ahead on tuesdays if possible. 

Keeping Up

Monday 

- at work: Environmental systems reading.

-at home: Environmental systems videos. (holy shit theres like 3 hours worth.)

Tuesday

- at work: Do a SOTU module/Env. system reading. 

- at home: Food and Beverage Reading (phone)

Wednesday

- at work: Food and Beverage DB/Quiz

- at home: - Environmental Systems Videos (any left) and discussion board. 

Thursday

- at work: Do a Lodging Module/Quiz - Take Environmental Quiz

- at home: Therapy and Brigid Chapter

Friday

- at work: Catch up on anything not done prior/Work on bigger assignments

- at home: Bigid Chapter if not done sooner/Brigid Conversation or ritual.

----------------

Saturday: D&D

Sunday: Breathe. (Environmental systems due)

Environmental Systems:

- well I missed the first assignment because he held the meet and greet meeting during the middle of the goddamned day and he sent out the instructions for the alternative assignment for those who couldn't make it on the day I was moving and unpacking all weekend. So, I got my first zero there. I really hate that for a grade we have to upload a damn video introducing ourselves with only 2 days notice. Granted it should be an easy grade but goddamn it i didn't even FIND my laptop till the end of saturday. but WHATEVER. 

- Module 1 Reading and test is due this sunday. So I need to work on that today... Maybe if I sneak some headphones to work I can listen to the videos? Cuz this shit is like 90% videos. (Today)

- HOLY SHIT THIS IS SO COMPLICATED ITS TAKING ME LIKE 2 HOURS TO GET THROUGH THE FIRST READING WHICH IS ONLY LIKE 3 PAGES

Food and Beverage Management:

- Read Chapter 1 and Chapter 2 (Tuesday. - home)

- Take Quiz and Do discussion Board (wednesday - work)

SOTU

- do module 3: Chimney Rock (tuesday- work)

- Find a Restaurant Owner to interview.... at least think of interview questions. 

- if I have more free time: work on figuring out the evidence project... ugh. jesus. 

Lodging:

- Take chapter 3 Quiz (Thurday)

- Analysis of Case Study Due by November (13.1) see if can locate it online? (sometime before november)

- HOTELSIM: Hotel Business Acumen Certification (Friday)

"Students are required to take a certification exam. In order to take the exam, you must have completed all four (4) HotelSim modules assigned. The URL links to the four modules are:

Module 1:  http://russellpartnership.link/CHBA1 

Module 2:  http://russellpartnership.link/CHBA2 

Module 3: http://russellpartnership.link/CHBA3 

Module 4:  http://russellpartnership.link/CHBA4 "

Mystery Roommate

 So we found out last night that we are getting a RANDOM roommate to fill our third room today when they move us to our new unit. 

We have a name and thats it. They weren't even going to tell us; we only found out when chandler went to apply to fill the room. They told her someone was already scheduled to take the room and she told us. 

We don't know if its a guy or girl. Don't know if its someone older or someone fresh out of highschool. 

Riley W***r. 

That is all we know. Theres guys by that name. Theres girls by that name. 

We have no idea. 

We don't know if they will already be in the room when we get there. We don't know if they are moving in after us. Clueless. Going in totally blind. 

So once everyone is moved in and we start unpacking or whatever.. We need to sit down and talk logitsics. 

1. What is your schedule like? When do you wake up... gop to bed... go to work/school... We can discuss noise levels and timing. 
2. How do you prefer to communicate when there is an issue? Text, face to face?
3. How do you prefer to handle groceries, cooking, storing food? Are you a family style/sharing is caring or a every person for themself style? What about using dishes and cookware?
4. How neat/messy are you? How do you want to break down the chores?
1. How do you prefer to handle the communal cleaning supplies like dish soap and trashbags?
5. How do you like to compress from the day? Isolation or socialization?
6. How do you feel about socialgatherings and over night guests? Do you have a SO?
7. What are some of your biggest pet peeves?
8. what do you like to do on the weekends?
9. how do you feel about dogs?
10. What are things you want to discuss in terms of operation?

Personal Questions

1. Are you an introvert or extrovert
2. how do you feel about religion?
3. how do you feel about drug use?
4. how do you feel about alcohol?
5. how do you feel about LGBT+?
6. how do you lean politically?
7. How Modest are you? I walk around without pants all the time and Dalton walks around shirtless. 
8. If you had to describe yourself and personality....?

Notes on My Classes ** Fall 2020

Environmental systems (SOTU 6100) - This one is gonna be Hard, but I knew that

* no textbooks =  Supplied articles and lots of videos (videos meaning I can't do this stuff while at work...) - lots of reading. 50 pages a week. sheesh. That part I can do at work at least.  

* 5 tests (first 5 modules) - bi weekly at least

* bi weekly discussions

*ALL ASSIGNMENTS ARE DUE BY SUNDAY NIGHT 

* 1 big project - 20% of grade

*ORAL EXAM GODS HAVE MERCY - 10% of grade *** But study material provided after quizzes

** Cannot Work Ahead. Quizzes only open from a certain date to a certain date. Cannot even read ahead. 

Lodging Management (HGMT 6410)

* Weekly Quizzes (study via quizlet) By SUNDAY NIGHT - Could probably knock these out in a day. 

*Discussion board on other people's Case Study

*Big Paper = Case Study

** CERTIFICATION TEST!!!

*Final Exam (not proctored)

******* CAN WORK AHEAD IN WHILE AT WORK 

Food & Beverage Management (HMGT 6400) - will be lots of work but shouldn't be overly difficult 

** NEED THE TEXTBOOK: E-Book Rental via vital source bookself... 

*Weekly Assignments Due EVERY FRIDAY 

*Chapter quizzes every week and Discussion Board ** In depth DB. 

* 3 Big Assignments (1: 3 small papers together, 2: Get to be a Food Critic, 3: Basically Another Business Plan, but in this time I'll put it in Asheville)

*No Final Exam

*I can only access it on my phone :(

Principles of Sustainable Tourism and Hospitality (SOTU 6000)

*Weekly Discussion Boards and Assignments due EVERY TUESDAY

*Big Paper and Presentation - Case study vs Research paper...????

*Interview Assignment - Villa Verde? Biscuit and the Bean? The Scullery?

*Photo Assignment

**Essay Final (its one last discussion board)

*No Final  Exam

** CAN WORK AHEAD WHILE AT WORK

Lodging and SOTU6000can be done at work for the most part. (aside from big papers and projects)

Weekly Schedule:

Monday: Reading for F&B (weekly)

Tuesday: F&B discussion board & Quiz (weekly)/ SOTU600 due

Wednesday: BREAK

Thursday: Env. Systems Reading (while at work)/Video (at home/bring in headphones?)

Friday: Env. Systems Quiz (Bi Weekly)/ Food and Bev assignments due. 

Saturday

Sunday

Triskele

So it has been motioned that I no longer wear my faerie star necklace by Brigid. I had come to almost define myself by the symbol and in a way I have been limiting myself by basing my spiritual identity just on being fae. It is not the only thing that I am nor is it the only thing I want to be known for. 

I was leaning too heavily on the fact of what I WAS/am on a soul level, and not investing enough in what I am/will be in this life. In this life it is my purpose to heal others, to aid them in transitional periods, and to help be a light to other non-human souls as they discover what they are and how to navigate living in two worlds like I do. 

I am now wearing a Triskele necklace in place of my faerie star. 

It makes sense....

Mind-Body-Spirit

Maiden-Mother/Warrior - Crone (the cycle that we women go through in life)

Brigid: Healer (midwife, children) - Bard (knowledge, inspiration) - Fire (forge, creation, harth)

it is one of the sacred symbols of Brigid (and some other goddesses) and out of all her symbols it is actually my favorite. I used to try this symbol all the time when I was younger, just doodling. 

I am by no means letting go and forgetting where I come from and what I am, but I am changing my focus. My end goal is the same; to be a faerie shaman/healer. But now I need to shift my focus to the healer aspect and develop that more. 

Chest Pressure

I've got this tight anxiety in my chest. I'm not sure if it's insecurity driven or being worried about his travel, but when I think about viking boy leaving for Illinois I have this crushing pressure around my heart. It almost feels like my heart is breaking for no reason. 

It makes me incredibly sad, anxious, and clingy. Especially the last 2 days and today, the day before he leaves, it at its worst intensity yet. I just want to hold him, kiss him, and cry. At first I thought it was just pms but it seems to be related to his leaving. 

Am I preemptively missing him? I know I am anxious about him going back there alone but he will have friends there and his son there, so I'm not as worried about a relapse. I'm not usually anxious about people traveling, but is that what i'm worried about? Am I that insecure about the idea of him being surrounded by pretty single girls and everyone being drunk and living in the moment?

Is it none of these or all of the above?

I'm not sure but my brain is telling me to find a plan B and my heart is hurting.