Update

I snuck back in and slept under the bed. I got some Smokey cuddles and woke up ready to talk to Jimmie about what happened.

Only I woke up to Diana and Cory seriously shit talking me.
Naturally my body did what it always does when it feels attacked: fight or flight.
I knew I was headed for an anxiety attack so I had to get away from everyone because there is a chance I could respond aggressively before the total lapse of emotional control.

I tried to get out as fast as I could.... but of coarse Cory - who apparently had plenty of shit to talk - made a comment about me running away again.

I informed him I was leaving so that I didn’t attack anybody.

It wasn’t a threat it was a statement of why I was leaving the place.  It was an aggressive response because of my anxiety attack.  Especially at him. He was practically telling Jimmie to break up with me.

So I leave, have my panic attack, come back and talk to Jimmie like I had intended to.
He and I are fine.

I am livid with Diana and Cory. The intensity they were shut talking was stunning. They apparently have these grievances with me and don’t bring them up to me.... instead theyvtrash talk. And yet I’m the one who can’t communicate?

Also apparently I’m weird in that all attacks, verbal and non verbal alike, trigger a physical fight or flight teflex. Jimmie says that’s not normal?
And I’m also weird in that I don’t shit talk the way they do? Like most of what they were saying would be shut I would have said to them in a simple conversation.

They also thought that I went to brooks and Amy to talk shit about Jimmie last night. I didn’t. I explained why I was distraught and simply lates down the whole time. Then I went home.

So now I have to talk to them. I didn’t have issues with them before but I sure as hell do now.


I’ve already talked to Jimmie about what I feel the best coarse of action is. He disagrees. Depending on how these next few conversations go will depend on how this situation will end.