Exams and Quizzes

EXAMS REQUIRING PROCTORS

Location:

ECU Proctoring Center
1031 WH Smith Blvd
Greenville, NC 27834

*** Ask off Dec 3rd for exams if possible

Test 1: 9/19 – 9/21 :      Schedule: Friday Sept  20th @ 10am - 12
Test 2: 10/31 – 11/2:     Schedule: Friday Nov  1st    @ 10am -12
Test 3: 12/3 – 12/7:       Schedule: Tuesday Dec.3rd  @10 am - 12

Marketing:

Test 1: 9/19-10/1  Schedule: Thursday Sept 26th @10am - 11:15
Test 2: 10/17-10/29    Schedule:  Monday Oct 21st @ 10am - 11:15
Test 3: 11/7-11/19  Schedule:  Monday Nov. 11th @ 10am - 11:15
Final Exam: 12/2-12/12  Schedule: Tuesday Dec 3rd  @1-4pm - 11:15

Quantitative Methods:

Mid Term : Oct. 10-12    Schedule: Thursday Oct 10 @10am -1
Final Exam: Dec. 5-7      Schedule: Saturday Dec. 7th @10am -1

More Realistic big girl budget

budget:

Rent - max: 650
Utilities - 100
Internet - 55
Health - 200
Car - 120
Phone -55
Gas - 60
Cats - 55
Food - 200
Misc - 100
Student loan - 100
Doctor bill - 50
Credit - 50
Savings - 100
--------------------
1895 --> 1900 after taxes

 2375  --> 2400 before taxes. needed each month

20 hours a week = 30$ per hour.
25 hours a week = 24$ per hour
30 hours a week=  20$ per hour
40 hours a week = 15.00$ per hour.

now there are some places cheaper than 650 that i'm looking at.

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1WP0IMGblhAjvwK-YNkDH8QgRn1xao-ieJZMq_2g7YDY/edit?usp=sharing

with cheaper than 650 rent ... lets say 525?

Rent - max: 525
Utilities - 100
Internet - 55
Health - 200
Car - 120
Phone -55
Gas - 60
Cats - 55
Food - 200
Misc - 100
Student loan - 100
Doctor bill - 50
Credit - 50
Savings - 100
--------------------
1770 --> 1800 minimum needed monthly income.
after taxes..

2200 before taxes. 

20 hours a week =$27.5
25 hours a week = 22
30 hours a week = 18.34
40 hours a week =  13.75


Minimum:

Rent - max: 450
Utilities - 100
Internet - 55
Health - 200
Car - 120
Phone -55
Gas - 60
Cats - 55
Food - 200
Misc - 100
Student loan - 100
Doctor bill - 50
Credit - 50
Savings - 100
--------------------
1695 --> 1700

2100.

20 hours = 26.25
25 hours = 21
30 hours = 17.5
40 hours = 13.25

so i need a job that pays between 13-15$ an hour. OR between 2200-2400 a month. OR 26000-2800 a year. in order to afford nicer places to live.

Do not need this right now.

I’m worried that sweetpea might be sick. She’s gone from feeding every 6 hours to every 3 hours and I think she has hyperthyroidism.

This can be treated.
How expensive it is to treat, I don’t know....
And if it’s gone I treated for too long then it can’t be treated.

If it can’t be treated or if I can’t afford her treatment...
I might have to put sweetpea, my old lady still so full of life, to sleep.

I’m very anxious about her vet appointment.

Plus before that I have a therapy appointment where things might get intense.
So I’m already going to be emotionally raw.
I know I am.

My anxiety manifests as anger in most cases.

I come home to my apartment reeking if weed.
I can even smell it in my goddamn bedroom.

Before ever moving in there was an agreement that smoking would be done outside on the patio.
Well they’ve broken that agreement with cigarettes- they smoke in their room with the window open. Pisses me off but as long as I can’t smell it in my room and the smell doesn’t attach to my things... whatever.

But weed is a whole other animal. And I’m fucking livid.
I am already stressed and I do not need this pushing my buttons because I will fucking explode on them.

I have already had it up to *here* with their neurotic dog that never shuts up.
I have to put up with their cigarette smell in the apartment - legally nothing I can do; this is not a smoke free apartment.
I will not tolerate this on top.

If it happens again, I’ll be a whole lot more confrontational. And if that doesn’t end it  I may just end up haveing to make an anonymous phone call...

Not the same

So.... kissing and making out with someone, even if it’s someone that I’ve had a crush on since Highschool, just isn’t the same.

The differences were... interesting. Different textures and aspects of a person to kind of explore... but it wasn’t really that fun.  Kissing wasn’t really that good. He was sweet, but... not Jimmie.
Sure it felt nice being adored and lavished with compliments and attention... but it got kind of annoying.

I always found Jimmie aesthetically attractive... now that I have had a recent experience to compare... I find the way he feels attractive too.

I never realized how much I enjoyed the coarseness of jimmies long locks, the way I can run my fingers through his hair and have it catch in my fingers... or the way his chest hair curls. Being rougher in texture makes it comforting to play with. Or how much I preferred the way his skin doesn’t just give in to my touch...

Don’t get me wrong... Dillon was more comfy to cuddle, but it was because he is just...
He was soft. His hair was soft. His skin was super soft. His muscles were soft and it was like being cuddled by a stuffed teddy bear.

But Jimmie... he feels strong when he holds me. His body doesn’t give to mine.. it supports it. I can feel how strong his arms are when they are tapped around me. I can feel the muscle in his shoulders. When he cuddles me, while it may not be like cuddling a cloud or a teddy bear, I feel comfortable because I feel secure and safe.

And I couldn’t help but notice almost the whole time I was kissing Dillon... I wanted jimmie. Dillon was too easy of a prey, as Fiona likes to word it. He was draping me in compliments but his words felt hallow and his tone was the same you give when playing with a toddler.

 His tone of voice was wrong. His smell was wrong. His texture was wrong.

He wasn’t Jimmie.

Actions are louder than words

His actions speak louder than the words of my insecurities...
I’ve been feeling very insecure about Jimmie and his sincerity and while I was too relaxed to care last night it bothered me today.

No more anger, just... mistrust.

His actions from last night and today have really reassured me.

I’m so glad.

Honesty

The blessing of honesty....

Well it was in reverse for a fuxking reason. 

I honestly don’t know what to believe right now... 

Jesus fucking Christ. 

Is it impossible for him to be honest? With anyone? 

He says something fucking terrible. 

Then says he doesn’t mean it.

But tells others that he told me the truth and I just didn’t like it. 

So what’s the truth?

That I’m not enough to satisfy him? I’m not proper enough, I’m not slutty enough, I’m not realistic enough, I’m too realistic.... I don’t have my shit together? That I need him? That I’m too dependent and I suck the life out of him? 

Or that he didn’t mean any of that and he just needs to grow as a person?

Considering he said the former more than once, and told others I just didn’t like the truth than I’d say that one. 

Or what about his fucking sad puppy dog routine saying how much he still loved me and still sees a future with me? 

Is that another lie? 

The Oregon talks. More sweet lies to fucking delude me? 

I feel like I’ve been made a fool of. 

Why is it so fucking hard for honesty? 

I’ve moved out. 

Drop the act. 

Fucking tell me that there is no hope and friendship is the only thing on the table. 

I am so tired of being lead on. It’s happened too many times and I just want people to be fucking honest with me. 

faerie meditation.

33: faerie magick - a little extra life force flowing through the fingers, a little extra depth in the way you see the world, a little extra tastiness to the food you eat, and a little extra kindness to you every day. Let whatever magic you do have the blessing of the fae - so that your words and your actions, your wishes and dreams begin to merge, one unto the other, until the inner world is mirrored by the outer world and you feel you are creating what you desire within your life. Co-creation, ceremony, a desire made actions blessing that is enacted, You are a blessed child of the fae, and they offer you now their magic. this entry into the natural world, so that you too can know the gift of the touch that brings life into the world.

4: rapture-  moment that makes you draw your breath in and pause, wondering at the beauty and the ecstasy of existence. Pure, unadulterated wonder that opens the heart and brings a deep joy. Feeling tht to be alive is a blessing, that to feel deeply is  a gift, that to be able to share the wonder of existence and natural raptures is an inspiration to all you encounter. it is as if your eyes can see a little mre clearly, as if your heart is open a little more wider, your whole being is leaning into te experience of life. You feel more connected to everything , more joyful, more patient, more kind, yet more active than before. you feel part of a grand story and you know how glorious life can be. this energy will flow through you into the world, becoming part of your contribution to the planet - and the faeries are glad you have finally touched the ecstasy of life and know the beauty of life. even when this moment has passed, you will be forever changed in magickal ways. 

30: Litha - the feast of the faeries are given to encourage you to take this day to drink down its sweetness, to celebrate your own life, and to bring a sense of being beyond day-to-day cares - to devote at least a portion of this day ti the divine acts of celebration and connection with enchantment. The gift of Litha s the gift of celebrating your life, living to the fullest, and resisting giving into those who would ask you to hold back and live less fiercely. feel uplifted by interactions with nature. this day will be long, and good, and sweet and filled with unexpected joys and kindness. 

5: blessing of honesty  *this card was in reverse so tis is a blessing i need to work towards or one tgat will turn my world upside down when i receive it. - your ability to see clearly what is true and what is not, to hear words that are truthful, to speak the truth in ways that will be heard, to live from the heart with integrity. Living true to yourself, settling effortlessly into who you are - for who you are is so earthy and real that others feel safe to be themselves too. there will be no self-deception and no lack of clarity. You are who you are, and that is a blessing to the whole planet. People will be open and honest with you, and all will be clear and true. 

23: Laughter - Clean and pure spirited laughter, not making fun of someone in any way. Lightening the serious load of life with laughter - a gift directly from the faeries who, although are serious beings, know how to laugh and play. Let laughter cut through the stiffness and propriety of life. 

34: Brigid's Flame -  she who unites us, she who protects us, she who inspires us, has claimed you. This firey ignition is key to the birthing of ideas ad ideals, and thus she brings her fire to your blessings, and ensures you will be warmed, that sacred hospitality will reign, that all will be welcomed, that solar light will burn brightly for you. Bigid's faery light is a brightness that brings warmth, new life, even rebirth to our souls. She is able to burn away within us all that is harming us and illuminate all of our best traits too. she will help you move further into your own creative power in healthy, beneficial ways that help people contribute from their very best selves. where her flame is, peace is found, inspiration is birthed, and goodness abounds, goodness flows, and a sense of united purpose completes us, and brings us home.

anxiety attack at work

talked with Lex at work about how is not uncommon for older lesbians to target younger ones and groom them because they are naive and easily manipulated.

got me thinking about how i am going to start to have to really talk about corrie and our relationship. which made me realize that most of it is a blur now.... and i got scared that she (my therapist) wouldn't believe me... 

and then i started to flashback. 

I got angry at myself and Fiona started correcting me and telling me it wasn't my fault...

i repeated it after her but i got stuck on it and with every repeat i felt more and more fragile... like i was desperate to defend myself to the world. IT WASNT MY FAULT.

I wanted to reach out to someone... Lexi had people at the bar and i didn't want to bother her.... my mom and friends were busy and besides what could they really do? I couldn't call Jimmie. I just felt so alone.

I was maybe a minute to two minutes away from hyperventilating when Mr. caird called me over to him. I think he saw me pacing and saw my expression. 

He gave me some wines to taste, the first of which was so bitter it actually kind of shocked me. 

Having something physical to the senses gave my brain something to hold onto in the tossing sea inside my brain and allowed me to pull/fiona to pull me out of the anxiey attack.

and now she keeps having me repeat

This does not make me weak.

I am strong. 

I am stronger than this. 

This does not make me weak.

I am strong.

I am stronger than this. 

I am stronger than this.

I am stronger than this.

and now i'm home and I can cry.   

this week overview

Okay so what i'm thinking.... is on monday/tuesdays look at the week at a glance. write up what is due that week and what pages have to be read, etc.



Like I know that I need

 to do module 1 for QM, which is just chapter 1.
But I need internet to get to that book... so i need to bring my laptop over to Jimmies if the internet isn't fixed by early tomorrow.
I need to read chapter 1 and do #1 and #13 before sunday 11pm 

Marketing.... is a check daily to see thing. honestly.

Accounting... i need to read chapters 1 and do the homework I think by Sunday before 11pm

getting this semester figured out

ALL EXAMS MUST BE PROCTORED
 proctors@services.northcarolina.edu.

: http://deproctoring.eai.ecu.edu/. --> on ECU???? 

and i need to set those up before sept 1.

ACCT: 9/19 – 9/21, 10/31 – 11/2, 12/3 – 12/7
MKTG: 9/23, 10/21,11/11,12/5-12/9

ACCT 6241 section 603 (crn: 86792) - Accounting
Online homework due every week on sunday: access was 152$ - bought
https://newconnect.mheducation.com/flow/connect.html?returnUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fconnect.mheducation.com%2Fpaamweb%2Findex.html%23%2Fregistration%2Fsignup%2Fa-peterson-fall-2019-2&_t=1566335172125&isReg=true

online textbook included, powerpoints and lectures on BB.
mulitple attempts give (3) on some assignments?
CHECK DISCUSSION BOARDS DAILY

All grades: 3 tests, HW, and discussion boards.


MKTG 6162 section 602 (crn: 82916) - Marketing Management
This was the fucking 400$ textbook with a code... I need to connect to that and log in.
MARKETING MANAGEMENT (W/ CONNECT ACCESS) - bought
Daily Homework

we have to make a group... people i want:
- Timothy Umphlett
- Jordan Tuders
- Kelsi Alohi
-Rachel Walters?

1. Exam 1 (Individual) 15%
2. Exam 2 (Individual) 15%
3. Exam 3 (Individual) 15%
4. Discussion Board Responses (Individual/Asynchronous) 10%
5. Peer Review for Moderation (Individual/Asynchronous) 15%
6. Virtual Consulting Project (Group/Asynchronous) 15%
7. Final Exam (Individual)                                                          15%


OMGT 6123 section 602 (crn: 83096) - Quantitative Methods
online LIVE lectures (there is a schedule on BB) but will be recorded for those who cant attend.
*Check announcments Daily
978-1-259-66636-0 · Edition 17 · 2017
STATISTICAL TECHNIQUES IN BUSINESS & ECONOMICS - NEED TO RENT FROM AMAZON TO LAPTOP
- Homework is optional but really does help you to learn - also helps realize what you don't know and can allow you to ask questions.
- "Course documents" has the 8 modules folders.


Midterm 25% (proctored)
 Quizzes (8) 20% (submitted through Assignments tab in Bb)
 Assignments (3 individual) 30% (submitted through Assignments tab in Bb)
 Final exam 25% (proctored)
*Proctored PAPER EXAMS
*You may use a formula sheet(s), which you will make up, for the exams/quizzes.
There is no limitation as to the number of pages. just formulas and
definitions. You will also bring the necessary statistical tables to your exams, where
necessary. You may use any type calculator that you prefer.
*There is always a review session before each exam where you can talk directly with me
regarding any questions you may have. I am a night person. Usually I am working until
1 am or later. Therefore, the best time to contact me is after 12 noon until late at night (or
early morning.) 

appointments with Mellissa Z.

8/14/2019 @11 - done

moving forward:
- people of support system, someone to see after the appointment or people who can be on the look out for symptoms that may manifest after appointments)
--> idk who i can actually see in person... I could ask jimmie if i could have lunch with him on days ive had an appointment, just to return myself to normalcy.... but i don't want to burden him with this and that especially is not giving him "space" from me.


8/21/2019 @11am
- my routine at new place, feeling at home, set a place for sessions.
- find fidget distractions.
-make sure to have a coping mechanism ready because we will be covering details
(lock the cats in the room, have pillow or something to hold/smokey, light music in the background to mildly distract and make talking about it easier)
- officially qualify for PTSD

8/28/ 2019 @11am

9/11/2019 @11am

Episode....

I had a episode last night 😞 we had just finished having sex and (I don’t know if you can have a flashback that’s just emotion without a memory but that that’s kind of what happened) - all of a sudden out of now where My body froze and I couldn’t speak.

I started crying and even though logically I knew nothing was wrong and everything had been fine and consensual I was scared and my brain was convinced I had been hurt.
I felt afraid and vulnerable and used and poor Jimmie tried his best to comfort me.
He helps saying he was sorry and reassuring me I was safe and loved and the whole time I just wanted to scream and hide in a hole. 😞😞😞

It was as if I couldn’t think, I could barley breath... I couldn’t control the tears or myself.
I felt just like I did when I had gotten home the night after the incident with Corrie.

Hurt. Used. Betrayed. Scared.

Makes no sense.. the only thing I can think of is that we have each other massages before hand, which Corrie use to do. But we’ve done that plenty of times with no episodes or flashbacks.


***edit the emotional flashback is called an  implicit flashback.
I wasn’t reliving anything, just put in an emotional state that came out of fucking nowhere.
That was last night.
I woke up feeling embarrassed, weak, pathetic, - a shaky weepy mess. So I did what anyone would do... I went to see my mom.
She got me back to a sense of normalcy, although I still feel kind of fragile.