Summer solstice Message.

 "Listen to me, this is very important. Not all things, even if they are good, are meant to last. It is okay to mourn their ending, it is okay to be sad. Cry and scream all you need, I am here for you. I know that taking a lover is not easy for you, so losing one can seem terrifying and like a sentence to solitude. Do not become hopeless. That is my fear, do not resign yourself to despair. I know that your desire for touch stems from emotional need, not physical, and while I cannot stand in for a lover, if the loneliness ever gets too much and you need to feel lips upon your own and a tender embrace, then come to me. I will not deny you comfort, take comfort in me until you once again find one who is suited to be your love. You will be fine. "

- Do not become hopeless --> Aine/Host of friends/Svn's fear. 

-  I will not deny you comfort --> platonic cuddling and kissing? Ellis maybe?

I think this message came from Aine, but I am not sure. It came from the character that is the mouthpiece for the fae in my trances. Aine is a faerie Queen and I've been feeling a pull to her. Yesterday was the summer solstice, her holiday, so it would make sense. 

While my friends with benefits situation with Viking Man is coming to a close... I had grown sorrowful. Losing him on top of losing Aaron (who leaves for New Orleans in about a week) just seemed too much. I consulted the mermaid cards (Aine's deck....) for a reading on future love so that I would not become hopeless.. and to my immense surprise, they actually told me about my next big love. Beforehand, it has always been "take time for yourself" "focus on yourself" "you need time out of a relationship"... which only made me want to cling to Viking Man even harder because that didn't bode well for finding love. 

It reads like a long period of solitude and singledom. 

This time, they said after I move to Wilmington, and I begin to focus on a new area of spirituality (sea witchcraft and working more with mermaids) a new and important love will find me. This person, a woman!, would be more than okay with establishing a divine connection through sensuality and be willing to work with my trauma (would not turn away at my being unable to do anything below the waist, either at all or would be patient with me until I am able to). The card was divine sensuality, making love, and erotica and yet the card itself told me that it wasn't talking about sex - specifically this person would return sacred sensuality back into my life. It's something I have been missing for a long time, even before Viking man. 

So while I am still intensely sad about my time with Viking Man coming to an end... I have cried many tears and will cry many more.. I am not hopeless.