OK i swaer i feel like i am off my meds.
Yesterday i was borderline depressed, today i just want to kill something. i'm highly irritable and anxious and i just don't give a flying flip about anything. i just want to take my racket and shoot balls at people. i feel like a troll and everyone is walking over my bridge but i can't do anything about it. I literally want to scare/hurt someone.....
i don't want to do my class work.
i feel like i'm in a toaster oven.
i want to growl and hiss.
i want to just sleep in a cool place with sunlight shining on me.
and then yesterday i was all annoyed and depressed and shirt. (i'm at school)
and now i find out that Jake's mom has to go through 3 months of chemo. and she might have to have a feeding tube.
And then last night i had a dream that i was at this dorm type thing with some friends and then Ashley (the really cute girl from FB) came in and crawled onto my bed. We watched something, anime i think, and she was laying on top of my back, with her arms around me. fast forward a bit past some slightly heated sensations and she leaves, as i walk her out my friend Reba pulls me aside into the bathroom and asks "Are you cheating on Jake?" i answer "no" while thinking "yet". And then i actually felt a little bit of guilt and shame.
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH....
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