Reflective Journal

What is your biggest weakness? On the other hand, what is your greatest strength?

My biggest weakness would most definitely be my fear/anxiety. At my core I am a very fearful person. 
I fear hardships.
 I fear failure. 
I fear abandonment and rejection. 
I fear conflict only because of the previous sentence. 
I fear being seen as a bad person because ^.  
I fear being lonely. 
I fear not having enough money to survive. 
I fear not having a surplus in case everything goes wrong and I need to be able to act quickly to survive. 
I fear being hurt, emotionally more so than physically. Physical wounds heal faster. 
I fear not knowing what to expect, the unknown is dangerous. (but it can also be exciting.)
I fear being alone in this life.... for if you are alone, then you are surviving - not living. Other people are what make this life worth living. 

I guess my other biggest weakness is that I am dependant. 
My happiness is dependant on other people... not in that it is their job to make me happy, but in that I am not happy if i do not have other people. 
I am also dependant on others to help me overcome fear.... simple fears like wasps or spiders. Bigger fears like personal failures are mine to tackle but having people there helps. 


My greatest strength is that I know I can make it through anything. 
Sure I may have a panic attack, but afterwards I'll shake myself and get through whatever it is that's going wrong. 
I know that If i had to, for whatever reason, pick my life up and start over somewhere alone with just my cats...I could do it.  
I am resourceful. I am adaptable. I can survive on the bare minimum if i have to. I've been poor before and I can survive until i figure out how to improve my situation. 
i have been friendless before... I made friends. i am a likeable person and i'm compassionate... While i do not require many local friends, I do require them. I can eventually make more if for some reason I find myself alone. 
I do not require much to live. I do not require luxury (although obviously i would prefer it). 
I am a survivor. That is my greatest strength. 

However I would also argue that my compassion and kindness, much like how dependency is my second greatest weakness, is my second greatest strength. It is because of my kindness and compassion that I make friends easily. It gives me empathy and empathy gives me better connection to others. Its what will make me a good mom. Its what makes me a good partner. Its what makes me a good friend. Its what makes me a good person.