acceptance.

Did some readings.

This is the one that made me cry the other day, when i did a reading on Jimmie and myself:

"Ragnarok:
There must be an ending, and it must come soon. You have stood between the forces of destruction for some time, believing that yo hold on and to maintain what is seeking to end as been the strong and right thing to do. But when this card comes, it is Ragnarok - the end of the world. And while this card can speak of earth changes and cataclysms that begin with the sea and the land ad the sky, it is more truly about the end of one time in your life. Because a cycle is nearing not only completion, it must end in order for the new beginning which awaits you to be given the space it needs to enter, and flourish.

Everything has its time. Every tree must fall. Please know that you are either weak, nor are you a failure for letting this ending happen. Holding on us taking up all your energy and draining you, when the finality you are hoping to avoid will actually bring you renewal, truth, and a raw primal moment when you become your own true self again.  Cease exhausting yourself by holding on to what is already over. You cannot stop what seems to be destruction. But you can ready yourself to face what must be faced, to go through the hard time that will soon come, but which will bring you so much richness, and so many opportunities. Let go, friend, and cease your quiet suffering. Howl, lift the sky with your cries of pain, but then sleep, and know you will return with a spirit daring, strong, and reborn."

it was so true I couldn't help but cry. I've felt the end coming and have just been denying it to myself. I purposefully ignored it and blinded myself to my intuition and I shouldn't have done that.

Then today the cards said to accept what has happened, focus on healing, and that this was meant to happen and will help me grow as a person.

I no longer have nay anger.
I just keep bouncing between intense sorrow and acceptance.
Soon hopefully I will stop bouncing and just linger in acceptance.

When that happens I can be around him and bot feel any pain.

He is and as far as i am concerned at this time, will remain my friend.