backwards

I didn't think that relationships were ment to move backwards but... to each their own pace I guess.


I saw the next stage of my relationship with jimmie being us getting our own place, just me and him. Starting our life together. The idea of which has gotten me through the past several months and helped me to hold my tongue on a lot of shit.


but apparently thats not what he wants. He's content to keep roommates until he graduates with his bachelors... hopefully no longer than that.

He doesn't want to have a place that is just the two of us.. which to me says he doesn't feel as committed to the relationship. He's not ready. so... we move backwards.

Everything happened too quickly for him. we moved in together too quickly and apparently the idea of having a place together after almost 2 years together is too fast also.  So.

now what?

stay in this awkward situation where I want it to be the two of us and he doesn't?

or

I move out when the lease ends. I look for a place I can afford on my own ( most likely will have to rent a room or find a random roommate and get another apartment) and when he feels like he is ACTUALLY ready for us to live together we try again.

because we are OBVIOUSLY at different points in how we feel about the relationship.

which hurts, i'm not gonna lie.

But i'm trying to think with logic and reason and not let my emotions get the best of me.

holy shit i'm back at square one and time is ticking. I know what i'm going to be doing for the next several weeks.