Changes

So I need to make some changes in my life. Brigid is helping me realize that while she is a mostly silent Patron, she is my patron goddess and she really just wants to see me shine. I need to stand out with all my quirks because I am meant to help people.... and how can I help them if they can't find me?

Changes for spirituality:

- let go of things that hold me down:

       - Jimmie - done

       - the belief that just because i'm human I can't access faerie magic (Work with Mab)

       - the belief that i'm too human

      - the belief that Fiona has to remain separate from me and the fear of who I will become when we merge. (work with Psyche and Cernunnos )

- Write More. Write anything. Blog posts. One shot scenes. Meditate/dance/read on past life episodes and then write them out as scenes? 

- Start fucking Meditating. It doesn't have to be sitting down and doing it the traditional way. "Your daydreaming muscle has been wasting away and you need to build it back up. It is your meditation and trance state. Make it stronger." Do it while running, walking, and dancing.

I need to make moves on my mental health:

- Spirituality has a big affect on mental health for me.

- so much anxiety.... my meds probably needed to be changed regardless.... but now i'm on a new psych med called vraylar. and while the side effects are no bueno, it could potentially be awesome. For now i'm stuck in a mixed bipolar episode until the medicinal effects kick in. 

- I am struggling with body image issues. (I need to work with Aine to see my beauty)

- Let go of the stress of finances... while important i need to trust that I will be taken care of in the long run (Brigid and Demeter)

Physically: DEMETER

- I need to stop living only in the physical with tiptoeing into spiritual

- I need to start being active again. Go for walks at least twice a week or start using my exercise ball. DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JUST FUCKING DANCE!

- I need to eat better..... what i am putting into my body is affecting everything. Consider going pescitarian or trying to cut out red meat/beef and pork on a large scale.  Cut down on fast food and if I do eat fast food, go for the healthiest option I can. Maybe Ask Amy and Emily for diet advice. 

All of these things and changes need to happen so that I can grow more bright as a person. I need to serve as a lighthouse to draw in other human-fae and anyone who may be in need of healing in ways that I can. I have known for years that my purpose in life i to help people transition from one phase of life to another... I can't do that If i am not in a place where i am able and if they can't find me. 

"Don't let your light go down, don't let your fire burn out. Because somewhere, somebody needs a reason to believe. Why don't you rise up now? Don't be afraid to stand out. That's how the lost get found."

This is about me finding my place in this human life as a teacher, guide, and healer. But first I have to get there.