Cutting myself down

Brooks am sure I are the hanged man..... well I'm cutting myself down.

Brooks wants to push me away then fine. I'll leave. I'm done trying. I'm done holding out the hope that he will get over himself . He will never apologize but I was hoping his anger would at least dissipate. But no. And I've had enough.

I've been like a yoyo with him. He pushes me away and I come right back. I'm not a you and this time I'm not coming back unless he actively tries to pull me back. But he won't. He said tok prideful and spiteful.

But missing him and caring so much, holding out how and being disappointed every time I see him has been making me suicidal. I've written two notes, almost gone through it twice in the past week.

He's not worth it. I love him so much it hurts me and it needs to stop.

When you get gangrene in your foot you chop it off.

He has isolated me, I'm gong to lose most of my friends by doing this but I have to. Self preservation.


No longer will I be the hanged man. I'm taking action and cutting myself down.


And it hurts. So badly.