Thursday, February 26, 2026

Sacred Flame - About Me Tab

 About Me

I am a faerie-souled bardic witch and pagan mystic devoted to the path of Sacred Authenticity.

My spiritual life is rooted in animism, polytheism, and a panentheistic understanding of Spirit. I experience Spirit not as a conscious being who intervenes, but as the ground of being itself — the animating force through which all existence arises. Spirit is not separate from the world; it is the underlying process and substance from which gods, spirits, land, ancestors, and human lives emerge. It does not make choices for us. Rather, it is the field within which choice, becoming, and destiny unfold.

The world, to me, is ensouled — not because Spirit directs it with intention, but because everything participates in this deeper current of being.

Faerie-Souled?

The language of faerie-souled is the closest I have found to describe the mythic current that runs through my life. I hold a personal belief in reincarnation and experience my soul as resonant with the archetype of the Leannan Sidhe — an Irish faerie figure associated with inspiration, beauty, and the fierce intimacy between art and spirit.

In folklore, the Leannan Sidhe is remembered as muse and enchantress — a being who inspires poets and artists with imbas or awen: divine inspiration that moves like fire through the bones. She is radiant, creative, and bound to the unseen currents beneath the visible world.

While I am fully human in this life, that archetype shapes how I understand my gifts. My work is rooted in inspiration, creative devotion, enchantment, and the honoring of beauty as a spiritual force.

My Practice: Bardic and Glamour Magic

I define magic as the expression of will, desire, and life force experienced in the material world. It is not spectacle or domination. It is participation — a conscious engagement with the currents of becoming.

Bardic magic is the use of creative expression as spiritual technology. Poetry, music, dance, storytelling, and visual art become portals through which intention moves. Through art, emotion becomes invocation, longing becomes spellwork, and inspiration becomes embodied change. Creativity is not ornamental — it is operative.

Glamour magic, as I practice it, is not illusion or superficial attraction. It is the intentional shaping of how one’s essence is expressed in the world. Because Spirit is the ground of all being, tending to the self becomes an act of metaphysical alignment.

Glamour is the art of embodiment — refining the vessel through which will, identity, and presence move. Adornment, voice, ritual self-tending, aesthetic choice, energetic boundaries, and disciplined self-knowledge all become tools for coherence. When inner truth and outer expression are brought into resonance, the world responds accordingly.

Both paths return to the same understanding: the Sacred is not elsewhere. It is the very fabric of existence.

My Ministry: Sacred Authenticity

"Ministry” may not be a word commonly associated with pagan mysticism, yet it best describes my vocation.

For much of my life, I suppressed parts of myself in order to survive. Living in fragmentation fractured my spirit. The cost of concealment was disconnection — from my body, my creativity, and my sense of belonging in the world.

Through healing, devotion, and disciplined spiritual discernment, I came to understand that Sacred Authenticity is not self-expression for its own sake. It is the disciplined courage of living in alignment with one’s deepest nature. It asks us to shed inherited masks, to confront the places we have hidden, and to bravely embrace the fullness of who we are — then to live from that place.

When we deny that core, we fracture.

When we honor it, we begin to burn cleanly — and clean fire reshapes everything it touches.

Sacred Flame is not something I give to others. The ember is already within you. Your own devotion, honesty, and willingness to live authentically are the breath that feeds it. My role is not to ignite you, but to tend the fire as it grows — offering structure, reflection, ritual, and witness as you become more fully yourself.

The name Sacred Flame arises from my devotion for Brigid — goddess and saint, keeper of the eternal flame in Kildare. Brigid embodies healing, poetry, and smithcraft. She is a bridge figure, spanning pagan and Christian traditions, hearth and forge, inspiration and discipline. Her flame is not passive light, but creative fire.

Through Sacred Flame, I create spaces where people may encounter the sacred — not as abstraction, but as something that asks something of them: the courage to live as they truly are.

My Formation and Qualifications: (by the time I will be publishing this) 

I have been offering spiritual services since 2018, including home blessings, guided meditations and journeys, and spiritual companionship. I have provided divination readings since 2012.

My background includes:

  • B.A. in Cultural Anthropology (focus in religion and folklore)
  • Master of Divinity in Spiritual Direction
  • Ordained Minister through the Universal Life Church
  • Currently in the process of ordination as a Deacon and Lay Minister with the Sacred Well Congregation

I was first introduced to animism through indigenous spiritual frameworks in early childhood. That connection was later interrupted when I was raised within the Baptist church, where I developed a deep understanding of Christian theology. As an adult, I consciously returned to animism and polytheism with greater theological awareness and personal agency.

This formation allows me to move comfortably between traditions — honoring structure, mystery, and the many languages through which humans seek meaning.

Sacred Flame - Home page Tab

Sacred Flame - A Ministry of Sacred Authenticity

Sacred Flame is a devotional spiritual care practice rooted in animism, creative mysticism, and the courageous pursuit of authenticity.

At its heart is a simple belief:

There is an ember within you — a sacred core that longs to be lived fully and honestly.

Sacred Authenticity is not self-expression for its own sake. It is the gentle and disciplined courage of living in alignment with your deepest nature. When we deny that core, we may feel fragmented or dimmed. When we honor it, something steady begins to glow — and from that steady flame, real and lasting transformation becomes possible.

Through spiritual companionship, ritual care, divination, and creative practice, I offer spaces where that ember can be tended with patience and respect. I do not ignite the flame for you. The ember is already yours. Your devotion, honesty, and willingness to grow are the breath that feeds it. My role is simply to help tend it as it strengthens.

This work is not about becoming someone new. It is about aligning your inner truth with the life you are ready to live.

Sacred Flame welcomes those who find themselves between worlds: spiritual but not religious, religious but questioning, rooted in alternative paths, or simply longing for a deeper connection to their own becoming.


This is soul-to-soul work.

It is grounded, relational, and unfolding in process.

It asks for courage, nurtures in safety, and gently witnesses change.


Whether you are seeking a single conversation, seasonal support, or ongoing companionship, you are welcome here.

You are not here to become someone else.

You are here to live fully as yourself.


The ember is already yours.

Sacred Flame is simply a place to tend it.

Sacred Flame - Spiritual Companionship Tab

What is Spiritual Companionship?

Spiritual Companionship is soul-to-soul work.

It is a sacred conversation rooted in the belief that you are, at your core, a divine being — carrying wisdom, longing, and a living spark of the Sacred within you. My role is not to define that spark for you, but to help you listen to it more clearly.

Each session begins with a gentle threshold moment — a brief meditation, a poem, a breath prayer, or a small ritual gesture to help us arrive fully and intentionally. These opening moments create a container of presence before we begin. From there, the conversation unfolds intuitively.

There is no formula to follow. Each session may look different, the structure is flexible to serve you. 

Some sessions may explore:

  • Life transitions and identity shifts

  • Spiritual doubt, deconstruction, or awakening

  • Grief, loss, or longing

  • Creative blocks and inspiration

  • Discernment and decision-making

  • Building or deepening personal ritual practice

  • Questions about faith, alternative paths, or living on the spiritual outskirts

Other times, you may simply need to speak freely and be deeply witnessed.

I do not work exclusively within the Pagan community, though I am most familiar with alternative spiritualities, animism, polytheism, and those who find themselves outside organized religion or on an interfaith path.  I welcome those who are spiritual but not religious, religious but questioning, mystically inclined, or simply seeking a space to explore their inner truth without judgment.

Not everyone has a religion.
Everyone has a spirit. 

Let us explore it together. 

This work can be devotional, mystical, reflective, or entirely secular. Some speak of God, others of Spirit, ancestors, the Universe,  the Divine, the Sacred, Source, or simply their inner knowing. We will use the language that resonates with you. 

My role is not to impose theology, but to help you listen more deeply to what is already speaking within you.

Sessions are typically one hour and may be held virtually or in person, depending on location. I offer a pay-from-the-heart sliding scale for virtual sessions. When meeting in person, I am open to barter and exchange as well. As I live semi-nomadically, flexibility and reciprocity are part of the sacred container we co-create.

You may come for a single session, for occasional support during a season of change, or for ongoing companionship as you deepen your relationship with your own sacred authenticity.

If you are longing to be seen — not as a problem to solve, but as a soul to honor — I would be honored to sit with you.


Sacred Flame - Tabs draft

 Not sure about the LLC part. By the time I make the website and this is published I will be ordained through the Universal Life Church and working on formal endorsement as a deacon through the Sacred Well Congregation. 


Home Page:

Business Name: Sacred Flame 

Services Offered: for single persons or groups 

  • Home Blessings
  • Spiritual Companionship Sessions
  • Spiritual Care Sessions
    • Divination Readings
    • Ecstatic Journeys and Guided Meditations 
    • Custom Spellwork 
  • Group Community Ritual and Gatherings 
  • Spiritual Workshops
    • Witchraft 101
    • Sigil Work
    • Candle Magic 
    • Glamour Magic 
    • Divination 
    • Basics of Journey Work 
    • Building Ritual 

About Me tab:

I am a faerie souled bardic witch and pagan mystic with a practice based in honoring sacred authenticity, glamour magic, animism, polytheism, and pantheism. Thats a lot of words but what does it actually mean?

Faerie Souled
I personally believe in reincarnation and feel the past life that is the most influential on this one is one in which I was a type of Irish Faerie called a Leannan Sidhe. While I acknlowdge I am very human in this life, the origin of my soul does have an influence over my spiritual gifts and where my spiritual focus derrives from. 

Leannan Sidhe were a type of Irish faerie that depending on who you ask were more muse or more succubus. They are a type of being that is drawn to artistic expression and bless those they love with imbas or awen - divine inspirtation. This usually came at a price, as the Leanna Sidhe would feed on her lover's energy. This Faerie lover was known for her radient beauty and love of the arts. So how does this influence me today?

My Practice: Bardic and Glamour Magic 
My personal practice mostly revolves around bardic magic and glamour magic. One first must define what "magic" is. I personally define magic as the expression of will, desire, and life force experienced in the material world. Magic is a process in which we access the divinity within ourselfs to create change in our reality. Its not quite as fast and visible as protrayed in Charmed or Harry Potter, but a more subtle means of creating change. I do want to preface that magic is not about control, we can only exert so much change when in balance with fate. Witchcraft is the act of accessing and using magic - this can be done through spellwork or even prayer. 

Bardic Magic is the use of the arts and creative expression as the method of witchcraft and accessing the divinity within. It is fueled by divine inspiration. Dancing, poetry,  music of any kind, storytelling in any form, and fine art are all methods of bardic magic. You could write a spell as a poem and recite it over a ritual bath or read it outloud over a candle and allow the flames to fuel the words and the smoke to carry it up into the world. You could listen to mood music and charge an amulet with an intention, fueled by the energy that the chosen song generated. You could hold an intention in your heart and release the energy for it through a fan dance or while beating to the rythm Spirit has guided you to on a drum. All forms are valid - it is the transmutation of energy and connection through art. 

Glamour magic is a feedback loop of love and prosperity. Essentially, you manifest your desires through self care and love. We are divine beings - when we support and care for ourselves, we are supporting and caring for the divine energy of the world. In return, the divine energy of the world will support and care for us. The more we love ourselves, the more we take care the universe or Spirit, and the more the universe/Spirit loves and takes care of us. This is energy work, holds no financial requirement, and requires self care on all contexts: physical, emotional, and spiritual. With glamour magic, intention is key. The primary methods of glamour magic involve anything that makes you feel beautiful, powerful, and fulfilled. 

Ministry Tab
My Ministry: Sacred Authenticity 
"Ministry" May be an odd word one would associate with a pagan witch. It is however a more recognizable way of saying "my spiritual vocation or calling." Growing up I had to hide a lot of who I am as a person and this supression had an adverse effect on my spirit and the life I was living. I have dedicated my life to the persuit and honoring of Sacred Authenticity, a path revealed to me through spiritual healing, guidance from my gods, and inutitive discernment. As such I seek to use my own spiritual gifts to uplift, teach, support, and encourage others to connect with their own sacred core in order to feel emboldened to live a life that serves their highest good through spiritual care. I want to foster a connection for people to form an intimate bond with the divine in whatever form that takes - be it a deity, ancestors, spirits of the world, or their own sacred authenticity alone. In order to follow this desire, Sacred Flame was created. 

The name Sacred Flame emerged out of my devotion to the goddess (and catholic saint) Brigid. Brigid has a monestary in Ireland where an eternal flame is kept alight. She acts as one of the few triple goddesses in Irish Mythology. She embodies healing and hope (water), poetry and inspiration (air), and smithcraft and hospitality (fire of the forge and hearth). She is an alturistic goddess that inspires me to serve the communities and people around me. 

Spiritual Services Tab: (to build from original list)

Why Spiritual Companionship?
I am a queer woman, a pagan witch, and I live semi-nomadically. As such, I have a lot of experience as someone who lives on the less conventional side of society. I have a variety of spiritual practices, one of which is spiritual companionship. I am a firm believer that the divine is within all things, it makes up who we are as living souls and consciousness. Not everyone has a religion, but everyone has a spirit - a sacred authenticity that deserves to be heard and honored. I want to provide a time and place that allows people to truly experience, express, and explore that sacred authenticity. For some, this can include a relationship with a sense of the divine, and for others it is a relationship with just themselves. I want to help others explore how they see themselves, how they see the world, ponder their deepest life questions, and feel empowered to live a life that brings their greatest happiness. This could be in a religious, spiritual, or secular context - to me all are the same and I can approach it from a way that feels most comfortable for you. 


I want to meet everyone as they are, where they are on their journey, and be a companion who walks with them for a time - be that for a single session, as needed encounters, or consistent meetings. I believe all people hold value, all people have stories to be heard, and everyone deserves to truly be seen regardless of their religious or spiritual orientation. If you feel that I am someone you would feel safe to be vulnerable with and explore the core of who you are, I would be honored to offer you an introductory companionship session to see if we would be compatible.

Qualifications:
I have been offering spiritual services such as home blessings, custom guided meditations and journeys, and unoffical spiritual companionship sessions since about 2018, and offering divination readings since 2012. I have a background in animism from my childhood spiritual introcudction, a understanding of the Christian faith through being rasied in a Baptist church, and I have a BA in Cultural Anthropology with a focus in religiona nd folklore. After a few years I went on to get a M. Div. in Spiritual Direction and became an ordained Minister through the Universal Life Chuch. Currently I am in the process of ordination with the Sacred Well Congregation as a Deacon and layminister. 


For Future Notes to Self:
Ordination through Universal Life Church
https://www.ulc.org/training/ordination-training/wisconsin
Formal Endorsement through Sacred Well Congregation's Chaplaincy Internship (seeking Deacon Ordination) 
https://www.sacredwell.org/membership/ordination-information/

Glamour Magic Work Shop

 How I define it:

"Glamour magic is a feedback loop of love and prosperity. Essentially, you manifest your desires through self care and love. We are divine beings - when we support and care for ourselves, we are supporting and caring for the divine energy of the world. In return, the divine energy of the world will support and care for us. The more we love ourselves, the more we take care the universe or Spirit, and the more the universe/Spirit loves and takes care of us.

This is energy work. By devoting yourself to honoring your own divinity and supporting yourself, you shift your energy to become magnetic. This really is a you-attract-what-you-give in a nutshell. You can do this through various forms of self care such as adornment through cosmetics and jewlery, what you wear, skin care, diet, going to the gym, mirror work, etc." 

Online definition:

"Glamour magic is a form of witchcraft focused on altering perception to enhance personal beauty, confidence, and magnetism, often using daily routines like makeup, fashion, and intentionality to shift how one is seen by the world. It is energy-based, using personal power to attract desires like love or success, rather than physically changing one's appearance. "

Friday, February 20, 2026

why do I want to be a spiritual director?

Who am I as a spiritual direction:

hello, I'm Pixie, a queer bardic witch and pagan mystic. As such, I have a lot of experience as someone who lives on the less conventional side of society. I have a variety of spiritual practices, one of which is spiritual companionship. I am a firm believer that the divine is within all things, it makes up who we are as living souls and consciousness. Not everyone has a religion, but everyone has a spirit - a sacred authenticity that deserves to be heard and honored. I want to provide a time and place that allows people to truly experience, express, and explore that sacred authenticity. For some, this can include a relationship with a sense of the divine, and for others it is a relationship with just themselves. I want to help others explore how they see themselves, how they see the world, ponder their deepest life questions, and feel empowered to live a life that brings their greatest happiness. This could be in a religious, spiritual, or secular context - to me all are the same and I can approach it from a way that feels most comfortable for you. 

 I want to meet everyone as they are, where they are on their journey, and be a companion who walks with them for a time - be that for a single session, as needed encounters, or consistent meetings. I believe all people hold value, all people have stories to be heard, and everyone deserves to truly be seen regardless of their religious or spiritual orientation. If you feel that I am someone you would feel safe to be vulnerable with and explore the core of who you are, I would be honored to offer you an introductory companionship session to see if we would be compatible. Is this something you'd be interested in?


Why I want to seek spiritual direction?
I want to better my relationship with my gods, spiritual friends and guides, and the divinity within myself. I need an accountability-buddy and someone to be able to have designated spiritual conversations with. It is a form of self care and once I start my own practice, will be something that holds me accountable as well. 

Affirmation, a notice or witness  - what inspires and what challenges?

Monday, February 9, 2026

Chinese ethics summary

  •  Kongzi/Confuscious 
    • Moral cultivation is central
      • The goal of life is to become a junzi (exemplary person).
      • Moral excellence isn’t innate or automatic; it requires lifelong practice, reflection, and self-discipline.
    • "Ren"/ Humanness --> the highest virtue 
      • Ren involves empathy, concern for others, and moral sensitivity. 
      • It’s expressed through everyday interactions, not abstract rules.
    • "Li"/Ritual 
      • Rituals, customs, and social norms train emotions and behavior.
      • Proper ritual practice helps internalize respect, restraint, and harmony.
    • Ethical relationships are foundational
      • Moral life is relational: ruler–minister, parent–child, friend–friend.
      • Filial piety (xiao) is the root of moral development.
    • Moral leadership over coercion
      • Good rulers govern through virtue and example, not punishment.
      • A morally cultivated ruler inspires people to behave well voluntarily.
    • Learning (xue) and reflection (si)
      • Study of tradition and constant self-examination are essential.
      • Knowledge without reflection is shallow; reflection without learning is dangerous.
    • A Focus on THIS world. 
      • Confucius avoids metaphysics and the afterlife.
      • Emphasis is on how to live well here and now.
  • Mengzi/Mencius
    • Human nature is good (xing shan)
      • Humans are born with moral tendencies, not moral neutrality or corruption.
      • Evil arises from neglect, bad environments, or poor governance.
    • The Four Sprouts --> these need cultivation like plants
      • Compassion → ren (humaneness)
      • Shame/disgust → yi (righteousness)
      • Deference → li (ritual propriety)
      • Moral judgment → zhi (wisdom)
    • Moral motivation is internal
      • People are moved to act morally by their own hearts, not fear of punishment.
      • True morality requires acting from concern for what is right, not self-interest.
    • Critique of rival views
      • Rejects egoism (e.g., Yang Zhu) and extreme altruism (e.g., Mozi).
      • Argues Confucianism offers a balanced moral psychology.
    • Benevolent governance
      • Rulers must care for people’s material well-being (food, stability).
      • Only then can moral cultivation realistically occur.
    • Right to resist immoral rulers
      • A tyrant who destroys ren is no longer a true ruler.
      • Overthrowing such a figure is morally permissible.
  • Zhuangzi -- Daoist focus
    • Skepticism about fixed distinctions
      • Challenges rigid binaries like right/wrong, useful/useless, life/death.
      • Human judgments are perspectival, shaped by limited viewpoints.
    • Limits of language and reason
      • Language divides the world artificially.
      • Philosophical debate often traps us rather than leading to genuine understanding.
    • Dao as spontaneous process
      • The Dao is not a moral rulebook but the natural, ever-changing way of things.
      • Trying to impose order or rigid norms disrupts harmony.
    • Wuwei  non-coercive action/non-action)
      • Ideal action is effortless, responsive, and unforced.
      • Exemplified by skilled figures (e.g., Cook Ding) who act in harmony with natural patterns.
    • Freedom from social roles and conventions
      • Social norms, moral codes, and reputations often constrain genuine flourishing.
      • True freedom comes from releasing attachment to status, success, and approval.
    • Acceptance of change and mortality
      • Life and death are transformations within the Dao.
      • Fear and grief arise from clinging to fixed identities and expectations.
    • The “usefulness of uselessness”
      • What seems useless by conventional standards may preserve freedom and life.
      • Refusal to serve power can be a form of wisdom.
    • Spiritual transformation (xin zhai; zuo wang)
      • “Fasting of the mind” and “sitting in forgetfulness” describe practices of emptying rigid perspectives.
      • These practices allow alignment with the Dao beyond social conditioning.
Summary comparison:
  • Confucius: Cultivate virtue through ritual, roles, and tradition.
    • "Filial piety and fraternal respect—are they not the root of humaneness (ren)?" (1.2)
      • Moral life begins in family relationships
      • Ren grows out of concrete practices, not abstract principles
      • Ethics is relational and developmental
    • If you guide them with virtue and keep them in line with ritual, they will have a sense of shame and reform themselves.” (2.3)
      • Moral leadership > punishment
      • Shame as a moral emotion cultivated by li
      • Early Confucian political philosophy
    • "In a neighborhood, it is humaneness that makes it beautiful.” (4.1)
      • Ren is socially visible and transformative
      • Moral excellence improves everyday life
      • Anti-individualistic ethics
    • “If I am not eager to learn, I do not enlighten; if I am not struggling to express myself, I do not explain.” (7.8)
      • Active, effortful learning
      • Moral education requires personal engagement
      • Confucius as teacher, not dogmatist
  • Mencius: Cultivate innate moral sprouts to achieve ethical order.
    • “Anyone who suddenly sees a child about to fall into a well would feel alarm and compassion…” 2A6
      • Innate moral concern
      • Compassion is spontaneous, not calculated
      • Foundation of the human nature is good thesis
    • "The feeling of compassion is the sprout of humaneness…” (4 sprouts) 6A2
      • Moral psychology (sprouts → virtues)
      • Ethics grounded in emotional responsiveness
      • Cultivation = nurturing, not imposing
    • "Only when people have a stable livelihood will they have a stable heart.” 1A7
      • Moral cultivation depends on social conditions
      • Political responsibility for ethical life
      • Contrast with purely moralistic theories
    • "I have heard of killing a villain Zhou, but not of murdering a ruler." 1B8
      • Moral limits of political authority
      • Tyranny voids legitimacy
      • Strong moral critique of power
  • Zhuangzi: Let go of moral fixations and social norms to achieve freedom and harmony.
    • Where Confucius and Mencius emphasize ethical improvement, Zhuangzi emphasizes existential liberation—questioning whether our standards of “improvement” are themselves the problem.
    • "“Its uselessness is what allows it to live out its natural years.”" - useless tree #1
      • Critique of social utility
      • Freedom through non-conformity
      • Resistance to political exploitation
    • "“How do I know that what I call knowing is not really ignorance?” #2
      • Radical perspectival skepticism
      • Undermines fixed distinctions (right/wrong, true/false)
      • Epistemological humility - we should be modest about what we think we know.
    • “I meet it with my spirit rather than looking at it with my eyes.” #3
      • Wuwei as skilled spontaneity
      • Harmony with natural patterns (Dao)
      • Non-deliberative excellence
    • "She had merely gone to sleep, and now she had awakened.” #6
      • Acceptance of life and death
      • Emotional freedom through perspective shift
      • Letting go of fixed identity
    • “Do not listen with your ears, but with your mind… then listen with your vital energy.” #7
      • Emptying rigid judgments
      • Spiritual practice beyond morality
      • Alignment with the Dao
Confucius (Analects 1.2, 2.3):
→ Morality grows through ritual, roles, and learning

Mencius (2A6, 6A2):
→ Morality grows by nurturing innate moral emotions

Zhuangzi (2, 3):
→ Flourishing comes from letting go of moral and social fixation


Thursday, February 5, 2026

Pendulum by Christine Valters Paintner


A silver coin sails across

the black sky making everyone

who sees it rich.


I know too what it is to feel

my poverty when the bowl

of night rolls down over me

with its ceramic thunk.


Some days I am swollen with

possibility, a ripe plum,

fingers sticky with sweetness,

while others I am hollowed out,

a bone scraped clean,

gleaming under the

weight of midday sun.


Many evenings my dreams

extend only as far as the garden gate,

desperate to unlatch the

red and rusted hook,


while others I throw away

the compass and cast myself

into sleep’s blue boat and

see where I wash ashore. 


What gifts and aspects of a SD apply to me?

❖The natural gifts of a spiritual director may include discernment; 

  • guiding others in prayer and silence; 
  • ability to note and draw attention to the significant insights and sensed movements arising in the directee; 
  • capacity for depth and breadth; 
  • acknowledgement of spiritual freedom; 
  • grounding in stability; 
  • interpersonal rapport; 
  • the ability to meet a directee where they are and hold a safe space for them and their spiritual exploration 

❖ Others recognize the director’s inherent qualities, such as 

  • accountability; 
  • wisdom; 
  • gentleness; 
  • compassion; 
  • maturity; 
  • caring; 
  • prayerfulness; 
  • traveling a recognizable spiritual journey; 
  • personal integration; 
  • openness to self, others, and the transcendent

❖ Honors contemplative connection: 

  • Directors seek to connect others with the deepest of truths; 
  • to support the spiritual transformation of self, others and the world; 
  • to embrace holism by integrating mind, body, will, and spirit 

Listens deeply: noticing, tracking, distinguishing, prioritizing, paraphrasing, waiting, probing,
challenging, and disclosing—always to serve the directee and the spiritual direction relationship.
Maintains an inner life practice: including prayer or other contemplative practice, reflection, deepening self-awareness, and familiarity with personal gifts, limitations, and wounds, recognizing that all these affect the spiritual direction relationship.
Honors healthy interpersonal boundaries: understanding when and how to make appropriate
referrals; acknowledging assumptions and personal biases, and recognizing when those get in the way of the spiritual direction; recognizes and avoids dual relationships.
❖ Exhibits habits of self-care and care for others 

I am able to approach spirituality from multiple avenues - as an experience and as a belief. One can have both or just one. \

I feel like spiritual direction/companionship is just shining a light on what is already there to until our companion is able to see it themselves. We don't mold or shape - we just exist as a light. 

Wednesday, February 4, 2026

More wedding daydreaming

 Okay so what if 


- get married on a nature preserve? Discounted or free. 

- reception at a private room in a restaurant; cash bar but for those that are sober we could offer zero proof drink options. 

* bar cart (apartif, whiskey alternative, tequila alternative, gin alternative, and rum alternative) 

https://www.ritualzeroproof.com/products/ritual-bar-cart-bundle-1?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=paid&utm_campaign=26010305_Conversion_RTUAL_RTUALT_NAT_USA_USOA_NORA_USD_AWA_AO_1-01-2026_6-30-202_4904580655_26007668&utm_term=26007298_BROAD_ADEA_mixed_RTUAL_RTUALT_FBM_FBIG_USA_AWA_PSOC_SOCAD_MIXD_DCM_NU_26206216_MIXED_ALBRP_A21+_CXD_EN_NU_AO_NU_NU_NAT_NU_OTH&utm_content=26010305_RTUAL_RTUALT_NAT_USA_NORA_ADEA_PSOC_SOCAD_VIDE_10SECV_EN_VIDSY+1_SHOP+NOW_F26_Q3_JFM&fbadid=120238823498550692&utm_id=120236999380570692&fbclid=IwRlRTSAPweQZleHRuA2FlbQEwAGFkaWQBqyySsrMelHNydGMGYXBwX2lkCjY2Mjg1NjgzNzkAAR5iQLc7iB0cChCIV9qDlb8J2ip07sBycrsRq6ZUQt0Kn9lyOrpY3x36rfG0YQ_aem_0E_wEixStjuL9_zmGP6eJg


**Wine alternatives: Apothekary drops. 1 full dropper for a cup of water or juice. Add sparkling water and that gives it bubbly 



OKAY ran this by him after momma suggested it. 

- Intimate Dinner Reception with live music, formal dances, and speeches -- dry 

- After party at a bar or club for alcohol and actual dancing for those who want to 

*This would allow for children past a certain age to attend the ceremony and reception (although they would have to be included in our 50 people headcount... so depending on who we want to invite we may still be childfree) and the anyone with kids who wants to party party can get a babysitter. 


1. I want Momma to walk me down the Isle 

2. Do the father daughter dance divided between Otis and Woolard. 

3. I want our first dance to either be Dandelions by Ruth B or Bright by Echosmith and the other to be what I walk down the isle to. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z_8ZXfaNCAc

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/GxSkKpDETZs --- oh god I started crying listening to this. 


Sunday, February 1, 2026

Realistic Designer wedding outfits

 okay so if I were to get this dress:

https://www.etsy.com/listing/4429002798/dusty-blue-tulle-prom-dressoff-shoulder?ls=s&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=blue+chiffon+corset+gown&ref=sr_gallery-1-18&sr_prefetch=1&pf_from=search&pro=1&frs=1&content_source=b3e41091-889c-4e0e-b12e-f99ffbd8c211%253ALT174fac82bcbeb748b355bc14a3b30c64dd52b32c&organic_search_click=1&logging_key=b3e41091-889c-4e0e-b12e-f99ffbd8c211%3ALT174fac82bcbeb748b355bc14a3b30c64dd52b32c

Add:

- champagne floral appliques 

- seen in terracotta crystals  

to look like this:

This could be really do-able. 
 for about $900 I could probably see if ...

Couture Sewing Collective or Salha Tailoring could do the work. 

Ask for:
- bodice appliqué embroidery ($500–$650)
- crystal waist cluster ($200–$300)

Option 2:
this dress:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/1673203567/jaylah-blue-off-shoulder-wedding-dress?ls=s&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=champagne+dress+with+blue+floral&ref=sr_gallery-1-55&sr_prefetch=1&pf_from=search&pro=1&frs=1&hc=1&content_source=f7646731-21d0-40bc-be57-4a1ced816738%253ALTe55db63a452601de06ce1dd51bb6781b6965d786&organic_search_click=1&logging_key=f7646731-21d0-40bc-be57-4a1ced816738%3ALTe55db63a452601de06ce1dd51bb6781b6965d786&variation1=4280905053

ask for:
- champagne petals to be added
- bodice applique embroidery
- terracotta waist cluster 

Thinking like this:


used AI so this isn't the best but: 

Option 1 




Option 2 (this has mesh in the V neckline that ai didn't put)



What do we think?

And for my groom:






Together now: (it started getting wonky with the faces but looking at these I really did want to cry. 




Momma would be helping me make these. 

Champagne applique options:
  • https://www.etsy.com/listing/533299686/embroidered-lace-appliques-champagne?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_ps-e-accessories&utm_custom1=_k_CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1GuK3OAktAGcsLQJulnomc_V5WvICzJssAAAqZyEeE1KDEDFMs4_ShoCNZ4QAvD_BwE_k_&utm_content=go_22634396526_180193307669_756461321021_pla-294930372950_c__533299686_12594011&utm_custom2=22634396526&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22634396526&gbraid=0AAAAADtcfRJ4S38uQ3WUSFsa5oSR3mDAE&gclid=CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1GuK3OAktAGcsLQJulnomc_V5WvICzJssAAAqZyEeE1KDEDFMs4_ShoCNZ4QAvD_BwE
  • https://www.etsy.com/listing/1843790821/champagne-floral-embroidery-beaded?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_ps-c-craft_supplies_and_tools&utm_custom1=_k_CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1DLTU-3hIGvjCedA4Fi4RA0RL7vYYMfz8GO-Ik0UhrTQegqqa2KPVhoCF5QQAvD_BwE_k_&utm_content=go_22633514805_182190775804_756432245162_pla-295462056867_c__1843790821_12768591&utm_custom2=22633514805&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22633514805&gbraid=0AAAAADtcfRKcH4DflawUr07Dct_n1oM8x&gclid=CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1DLTU-3hIGvjCedA4Fi4RA0RL7vYYMfz8GO-Ik0UhrTQegqqa2KPVhoCF5QQAvD_BwE
  • https://www.etsy.com/listing/476990907/bundle-6pcs-champagne-lace-applique-sew?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_c-accessories&utm_custom1=_k_CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1IUJD5OEpNxq6YUdYX9X_N2f0WBS2Xbt3Z0WEnIzM2-YqIYv6DAMixoCE6kQAvD_BwE_k_&utm_content=go_21802015417_169566879078_716586690216_pla-294930372950_c__476990907_509526355&utm_custom2=21802015417&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21802015417&gbraid=0AAAAADtcfRI1KHJjw8vEy_xB4zy_l4-zn&gclid=CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1IUJD5OEpNxq6YUdYX9X_N2f0WBS2Xbt3Z0WEnIzM2-YqIYv6DAMixoCE6kQAvD_BwE
  • https://www.laceusa.com/products/95969w-hb-beaded-corded-floral-lace-applique-embroidered-on-100-polyester-net-mesh-lace-usa?variant=43934464901294&country=US&currency=USD&utm_medium=product_sync&utm_source=google&utm_content=sag_organic&utm_campaign=sag_organic&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=&utm_term=&utm_content=745650457121&utm_adgroup={adgroup}&utm_network=g&utm_device=c&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20200186752&gbraid=0AAAAAo8Yn6y6R8Wkd1APrY8uE4Bw_T3Eg&gclid=CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1IBLVdlEitJeci8A4t0JRvjHngaMhwY2eF59vB5lX2VDXgoRQ0sTVhoCa_UQAvD_BwE


Rhinestone belt inspiration:
  • https://www.etsy.com/listing/616305141/lisali-sparkly-wedding-belt-bridal-belt?gpla=1&gao=1&
  • https://www.etsy.com/listing/1446611150/silver-jeweled-light-blue-clear-stone?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_en_us_-weddings&utm_custom1=_k_CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1GJEuPqmvl-MHoEsydVnbnoCRUhIz4MQJS5jJeqJBpXDo7mDbV4L_xoCN7gQAvD_BwE_k_&utm_content=go_21791666544_169566863918_716586689181_pla-298195655715_c__1446611150_112046819&utm_custom2=21791666544&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21791666544&gbraid=0AAAAADtcfRL9KQz8MaW5Bm1zQbmd8H-di&gclid=CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1GJEuPqmvl-MHoEsydVnbnoCRUhIz4MQJS5jJeqJBpXDo7mDbV4L_xoCN7gQAvD_BwE
  • https://www.etsy.com/listing/4376643105/wide-rhinestone-bridal-belt-crystal?gpla=1&gao=1&&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping_us_en_us_-weddings&utm_custom1=_k_CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1IF2ZzD4Lrjl9HmUzBIi87kPX1fYYeKsZtaNMgzP0Bxy9po_MTwJmBoC5i0QAvD_BwE_k_&utm_content=go_22434678705_178445188936_746194064300_pla-298195655715_c__4376643105_12768591&utm_custom2=22434678705&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22434678705&gbraid=0AAAAADtcfRKaUxlI-z5caPpA7ufVVvELb&gclid=CjwKCAiAwNDMBhBfEiwAd7ti1IF2ZzD4Lrjl9HmUzBIi87kPX1fYYeKsZtaNMgzP0Bxy9po_MTwJmBoC5i0QAvD_BwE
Rhinestones:
  • https://www.amazon.com/Handmade-Shining-Rhinestones-Applique-Accessories/dp/B0CHDP41SL/ref=sr_1_53?crid=9NJB64EKDR2N&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9._EK5hN0YAC-jsbONnTlHqqIf-dx5fXOZD35F_id_kYgoH5pqOrJNjFqE9KAHhSa-EisOxKs7Bv9NpNdw3qbhkjIM4RcYCJVoI3XFnyP0Sv3tK_THFWjQ3qy6EEJM-XsmuFpERacyO71y9mUTdtTMb15aBQJR5tPfDTfK7weyZFtg_AEqb0rvzaNTg8fR_7eW35UJLA-jE3PCMMxe8K-Wt_Fk6phSCNTILhSytaOn4bOglJGsnXg2eRklC50Jt4XbTaKsSf-7Y9kc5x8cBjhYoGG9ZKJm_o1TMhQsnrX96r4.sW_tsRz1dzj4iGlXfi1Ng4PjyggD3HqC85nF8B_iKwE&dib_tag=se&keywords=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing&qid=1771367702&sprefix=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing%2Caps%2C141&sr=8-53&th=1
  • https://www.amazon.com/uxcell-Rhinestone-Crystal-Applique-Wedding/dp/B0DS9M3XCP/ref=sr_1_15_sspa?crid=9NJB64EKDR2N&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9._EK5hN0YAC-jsbONnTlHqqIf-dx5fXOZD35F_id_kYgoH5pqOrJNjFqE9KAHhSa-EisOxKs7Bv9NpNdw3qbhkjIM4RcYCJVoI3XFnyP0Sv3tK_THFWjQ3qy6EEJM-XsmuFpERacyO71y9mUTdtTMb15aBQJR5tPfDTfK7weyZFtg_AEqb0rvzaNTg8fR_7eW35UJLA-jE3PCMMxe8K-Wt_Fk6phSCNTILhSytaOn4bOglJGsnXg2eRklC50Jt4XbTaKsSf-7Y9kc5x8cBjhYoGG9ZKJm_o1TMhQsnrX96r4.sW_tsRz1dzj4iGlXfi1Ng4PjyggD3HqC85nF8B_iKwE&dib_tag=se&keywords=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing&qid=1771367702&sprefix=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing%2Caps%2C141&sr=8-15-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9tdGY&th=1
  • https://www.amazon.com/Different-Rhinestones-Handicrafts-Clothing-Decorations/dp/B07VF1FTBC/ref=sr_1_25?crid=9NJB64EKDR2N&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9._EK5hN0YAC-jsbONnTlHqqIf-dx5fXOZD35F_id_kYgoH5pqOrJNjFqE9KAHhSa-EisOxKs7Bv9NpNdw3qbhkjIM4RcYCJVoI3XFnyP0Sv3tK_THFWjQ3qy6EEJM-XsmuFpERacyO71y9mUTdtTMb15aBQJR5tPfDTfK7weyZFtg_AEqb0rvzaNTg8fR_7eW35UJLA-jE3PCMMxe8K-Wt_Fk6phSCNTILhSytaOn4bOglJGsnXg2eRklC50Jt4XbTaKsSf-7Y9kc5x8cBjhYoGG9ZKJm_o1TMhQsnrX96r4.sW_tsRz1dzj4iGlXfi1Ng4PjyggD3HqC85nF8B_iKwE&dib_tag=se&keywords=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing&qid=1771367702&sprefix=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing%2Caps%2C141&sr=8-25&th=1
  • https://www.amazon.com/Colorful-Rhinestones-Halloween-Decorations-Accessories/dp/B0DQ4QFGWR/ref=sr_1_30?crid=9NJB64EKDR2N&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9._EK5hN0YAC-jsbONnTlHqqIf-dx5fXOZD35F_id_kYgoH5pqOrJNjFqE9KAHhSa-EisOxKs7Bv9NpNdw3qbhkjIM4RcYCJVoI3XFnyP0Sv3tK_THFWjQ3qy6EEJM-XsmuFpERacyO71y9mUTdtTMb15aBQJR5tPfDTfK7weyZFtg_AEqb0rvzaNTg8fR_7eW35UJLA-jE3PCMMxe8K-Wt_Fk6phSCNTILhSytaOn4bOglJGsnXg2eRklC50Jt4XbTaKsSf-7Y9kc5x8cBjhYoGG9ZKJm_o1TMhQsnrX96r4.sW_tsRz1dzj4iGlXfi1Ng4PjyggD3HqC85nF8B_iKwE&dib_tag=se&keywords=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing&qid=1771367702&sprefix=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing%2Caps%2C141&sr=8-30&th=1
  • https://www.amazon.com/Heyiwell-Crystal-Rhinestone-Flatback-Setting/dp/B0CS1NSN35/ref=sr_1_2?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9._EK5hN0YAC-jsbONnTlHqvPn60EYQjXPXiDn0O1RmT1KRjfV1pmVWCMEEOdtD9z1hr35rKHUBrDSqoBZtktVAgq_tKTzn5u-f0Z_gpfRLimi5aZev3dpbchybHab4REiyru9pTz2k5K_PArNpgONfAQQ8UHm13JFOIci7UD-TVhzTP6wJ4Y6yCx-1OZCPWW8JpjT4d49X07rT6ZEmTSe5QAItXd3K9atJ0RrPX0QxKGINFq9T6uCUy1ibwOTjFQxVLM1LRWltUO5551G5N4dh_uhxBN7gI5gMXf2JgYOKw0.v_rH7o8-9r-66Tn_6Dx9NtM-1IM9APKMMmbYfA4z7f4&dib_tag=se&keywords=orange%2Bglass%2Brhinestones%2Bfor%2Bsewing&qid=1771368273&sr=8-2&th=1

Or if  we don't go with it...there is this dress already made on Etsy that she lady who does it said can switch the neckline to a sweetheart neckline. Which could also really work 


For a more traditional dress I could get this one in champagne.