damn.

oops. i cried. haha.

i was talking to a friend about my fear of loosing my best friend, jake. here's the convo:

me: i feel slightly jealous of __(the girl he is trying to see)__
i'm scared she will take my best frien away from me. and it tarrifies me because i really do love jake. i don[t want to loose him
but
he isn;t mine
so i can't lose him
 i don't have the right to feel this way
but

him: well of course hes yours. Hes your best friend

me: (tears up) but i'm going to lose him

him: but i dont think youll be losing him sweetie

me: (tears  up more) but i will
i only have a year and a half left
to see him
and then life will seperate us.
and.. i barley see him now
and.. with __(her name)__, he will be seeing her
and i'll lose him.

him: you will always be in touch
youre still a lot to him

me: yeah... he won't have a choice about that part xD
really?

him: Really.
Youre Lisa, He'll never let you go

me: (this is after i've busted into tears now...full on)
right..
thanks
:')
lol i would hate to let jake know i cried over him haha
so, i'd apreciate it he didn;t find out about this




yeah. why am i being so emotional? why am i suddenly so insecure about the person i thought i would always have? idk.... i want to tell him how i am feeling, but he would only laugh at me...